Why Adults Quit Martial Arts: Understanding the Challenges

The First Month Experience for Adults

Preface: Adults and kids have different experiences during their first month, so this post will address adult students only. Enjoy!

Most adults quit martial arts within their first month, and not because they’re weak. It's because martial arts is a strange, sweaty, and intimidating world. However, if you know what to expect, you’ll be much more likely to stick with it.

Some people make excuses, while the real reasons are often more subconscious. Others simply aren't interested. Generally, people face a mix of the "obstacles" I will discuss. Despite my aggressive opening (for views), I completely understand why people quit. I have felt the same way. My hope is to make people more aware of these obstacles so they can either overcome them or find a hobby that suits them better.

The Obstacles of Martial Arts

Physicality

One's physical ability is the most common excuse, but it’s also the most understandable for adult students. I often hear people say, "I am not ready yet; I need to get in shape." Conversely, some jump in too fast, thinking they are still 20 years old, and end up injuring themselves and never returning. Again, both reactions are completely understandable.

So, what can you do? Here are two key points:

1. Leave Your Ego at the Door: Come in as you are. As a group, we can help you lose weight and recover from injuries. You don’t get in shape before starting martial arts—training is what gets you in shape. You wouldn’t shower before taking a shower, right? The same applies to martial arts. Show up as you are and enjoy the journey.

   
   

2. Don’t Jump in Too Fast: I see it all the time. People join, love the class, want more, and then—bang! They get injured. Again, leave your ego at the door. The cool part about being a white belt is that no one expects anything from you. So, relax and enjoy the process of growth.

   
   

Making Friends

This is an area where I usually struggle, but I've noticed a few others deal with it as well. In my experience, the reason people struggle to make friends isn’t due to their social skills but rather their behavior on the mat.

Here are a few reasons someone might hesitate to partner with you: you might smell, be too rough or unpredictable (often referred to as ‘spazzy’), or give off the wrong vibe. The good news is, this can be fixed! Here are some tips:

1. Take a Shower Before Class: Hygiene is crucial in close-contact sports.

2. Slow Down and Stay Relaxed: A calm demeanor is more inviting.

3. Stay Humble: Confidence is good, but arrogance can push people away.

   
   

Culture Shock

A martial arts school can feel like a strange place. We often have a variety of unusual rules that may not make sense at first. The entire premise is that you are learning to fight, which is frowned upon by many. There is also a lack of "personal space," especially during grappling or sparring.

While culture shock isn't the main reason people quit, it can create friction for newcomers. The only way to overcome this obstacle is to stick it out. Over time, you will learn the traditions and feel more comfortable training. Just give it time.

The Importance of Community

One of the most rewarding aspects of martial arts is the sense of community it fosters. You will meet people from various backgrounds, all united by a common goal: to improve themselves. This camaraderie can help you push through the initial challenges.

Participating in group activities, such as sparring sessions or belt tests, can also enhance your experience. These events create opportunities to bond with fellow students and instructors. The friendships you form can make your martial arts journey much more enjoyable.

Setting Realistic Goals

Setting achievable goals is crucial for your success in martial arts. Instead of focusing solely on earning a black belt, break your journey into smaller milestones. Celebrate your progress, whether it's mastering a new technique or improving your fitness level.

This approach not only keeps you motivated but also helps you appreciate the journey. Remember, martial arts is not just about the destination; it's about the growth and learning along the way.

Conclusion

Every black belt once thought about quitting in their first month. The key is to show up, breathe through the weirdness, and give yourself time to adapt. You might be surprised at how quickly it becomes home.

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Remember, martial arts is a journey, not a race. Embrace it fully, and you may find a passion that lasts a lifetime.